The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly: A Critique with Kate Sullivan

I know that many of you are curious as to how the conference went, and so I thought I’d start with the critique. First, let me say that the following is my take on the critique and should not be attributed as any type of quote or endorsement from Kate.

Prior to the critique, my novel began with a prologue. I liked it, but something about it bothered me. The fact that some agents and editors don’t like prologues also made me nervous about beginning my story with one.

Finally, I realized the problem: the prologue could not be in my main character’s point of view, so the reader didn’t experience my main character’s voice until six pages into the manuscript. Realizing this, I cut the prologue, but not until after I’d already submitted the story for the critique. While I was a little disappointed (in myself) for not cutting it sooner, I thought it would be useful to have Kate’s opinion on the original version.

The Ugly: Ditch the prologue or find a way to use a teen’s point of view.

So Kate’s critique confirmed my gut feeling on the prologue, and it gave me another reason for cutting it (the adult POV). All in all, it was easy to swallow the ugly.

The Bad: Confusing prose—needs more description.

Because I’m writing a YA fantasy, I need to make sure that any reader can pick up the book and visualize my characters. While Kate thought my world was interesting and rich, she couldn’t visualize some of my characters.

My plan of action for this is to go back in and add description. But this is going to take some work. If I add too much, it’s going to slow the pace down, which might make it difficult to pull the reader into the story.

The Bad Continued: The opening is a bit too complex.

I struggled to find the perfect opening for this story. I wanted to make sure that it had a hook. And it does. In fact, it has too many—I think Kate identified four or five things. Her suggestion was to move a few of the items to other chapters. This will space out the information and allow the reader to transition into my story.

All in all, I can correct these issues, and make the story stronger.

And now my favorite part: The Good:

• I have a strong character voice. Kate got a good sense of my main character from the dialogue and attitude.



• My story has epic potential. I asked her whether this was a good thing or not. I could see an agent or an editor shying away from something that felt epic. Her response was that teens love epic. So I’m taking this as a good thing.



• My world is rich and has clear rules.



• My synopsis is really good. It needs just a bit of tweaking, but it’s strong.

All in all, I have a good start to my novel. Now I just need to make it better. I appreciate Kate taking the time to give me her opinion, and I think her critique will help me to do what needs to be done.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this. Also, feel free to share your experience with a critique. Did it make your story stronger? Or did you disagree with the evaluation? (If you leave a comment about a disagreement, please do not include the name of the person who critiqued your manuscript.)